MBTI and Sexual Enjoyment
While all personality types enjoy sex in different ways and to varying degrees, I can’t help but wonder if certain types are more drawn to that raw intimacy than others based on their cognitive types. I have no scientific proof, but I thought I could begin the discussion with this hypothesis.
Enjoyment of sex often requires two things: an ability to live effortlessly in the moment and a deep, intimate connection. Extraverted sensing (Se) types and too a lesser extent extraverted intuitive (Ne) types are the most comfortable at living in the moment. Those types constantly look outside themselves for their perceptions. The Se-friendly type especially can enjoy every aspect of sight, touch, smell, sound, and taste that sex provides. They are right here, right now, enjoying every sensual aspect of their partner.
Introverted feeling (Fi) types get the most enjoyment from the intimate spiritual connection of sex. Fi provides individuals with strongly held values but, more importantly, well-developed empathy. No other cognitive function offers more excitement in response to a partner’s excitement.
The xSFP types combine Se and Fi as their dominant and secondary cognitive functions. I give the ESFP the nod here because of the dominant Se function.
Both xSTP types also share a strong familiarity with Se. ESTPs use it as their dominant function and ISTPs use it as their secondary function. However, they lack the empathy of their other SP companions. Without that connection, they likely take a more lusty, animalistic pleasure in sex.
These two types do share the empathy of Fi. INFPs use it as their dominant function and ENFPs as their secondary function. They seek a strong emotional connection in all of their relationships, especially their sexual encounters. While their strong Ne allows them to explore their outside world with a fierce imagination, they likely enjoy sex only as much as the spiritual and emotional bond they share with their partner.
Both types frequently explore their outside world with the imaginative exploration of Ne. ENTPs possess dominant Ne and INTPs possess secondary Ne. Sex provides a creative bounty of possibilities for the Ne. While they may not have the deep emotional connection with their partner, they can enjoy constantly trying new things in the bedroom. As long as sex continues to stimulate their mind and imagination, they can greatly enjoy its many experimentations.
Extraverted feeling (Fe) types might enjoy sex in a more indirect manner. Above all, Fe seeks harmony in their relationships. They want people to get along. A seamless and enjoyable sexual relationship stands at the pinnacle of harmonious interactions. Like the Fi types, Fe types enjoy seeing their partner pleased and excited, though they probably don’t feel that deep heartfelt connection as much as the Fi types. The extraverted xxFJs use Fe more frequently than the introverts. The NFJs also possess a weak Se function. While they will never feel as comfortable with their sexuality as the SPs, they can, over time, grow to enjoy the raw physicality of sex to a certain degree.
These four types are the most divorced from their own physical bodies and from physical connections from others. They all turn their perception inward, to their own past or future. In relationships, they seek not harmony or empathy, but order and control. I imagine the only pleasure they get from sex results from either dominating another or the wild thrill of submitting to another when they usually feel so much in control. It reminds me of Kevin Spacey’s character in House of Cards, the way he uses sex as a political transaction. Like the four Fe types above, the extraverts feel slightly more comfortable with their Te function than the introverts. Similarly, the NJs have a weak Se function, but for someone so in control, it may take them years to get over the embarrassment they feel for enjoying physical pleasure.